The hybrid was lying in bed, it was around seven am. The wolfcat's eyes explored over the text of the pages of a book, who's cover read Clive Barkers Damnation Game. Blackish grey paws flipping [ages, from the first to the current page, twenty seven.
With a yawn escaping the wolfcat's blackish grey muzzle, he, or as she preferred to be called. The wolfcat is just your average transgender. A female in mind, heart, and soul, but all sealed in a male's body. One that on its best days, she tolerated, and on her worst, she hated. But as long as she had been living with this, six years or so, one grows 'numb' to some things.
Even in her younger years, she didn't just fit into her gender. All through her middle school years, she could be found with the girls, sitting around, talking, drawing, or playing with the other girls hair and fur.
Then through the darker, harsher years of high school. She never found herself on the sports field, but on the side lines, her eyes drawn to the males and her mind wondering why she was having such exciting thoughts. But all of that was just the start. She wasn't popular or anything close. I mean she had her friends, but more enemies than allies.
The enemies that she had were relentless. The assaults and attacks ranged from just words and name calling to down right physical attacks. She would fight back, but she wasn't a fighter. She was just under average, she wasn't frail, but she wasn't fit.
All of this, blinded with the fact that she was coming to the realization that she wasn't attracted to females, like a boy her age should be. On more that one occasion she came within a few steps of killing herself. She would see it as her only way out, her only way to get peace. But something would always stop her, and she never really figured it out. If it was her few friends, her family or what, but it kept her going.
Over the stretch from being fifteen, she always had thoughts and dreams right up until now, at the tender age of twenty one. The dreams came first, and they were always the same. Ones where she was living a dream life of hers as a female or in some cases the dream would start with her as a he, and through some magic or event would transform into a girl. Little did the wolfcat know, but dreams are the sleeping mind's way of solving problems of the waking world.
Next came the thoughts and the full on fantasies. The thoughts started simple, just little thoughts of what it would be like to be a female, right to the full on fantasies about living and being a female.
Sadly her min, scared by the hell that she had to ender at school, just for not fitting in. She thought that shed be killed. Growing up in a southern Baptist family didn't help. So with all that she suppressed then, the thoughts and wished of being a female, trying to tell her self that it was wrong, that she was a boy, and nothing more.
So up until a short time before her recent twenty first birthday she denied and hid it. Secretly indulging in her fantasy over the Internet, role playing as a female.
Only a few days before that faithfully day, she started feeling depressed. More so than she had in her young life. It was then that she decided that it was time to do something. She made an appointment with a local therapist. Before the visit she came out to her mom.
The whole event went well, better than she thought. Her over active mind telling her that she would be kicked out, or worse, but that didn't happen. Her mom was happy that she was going about this the right way. Mind you, like with the girl's sexuality she accepted it, and still loved her, but she didn't approve of it. The wolfcat was happy that her mom, friends and mates accepted her. The girl had so much to look forward to, and she really just wanted to burry her past in the silent depths of her mind.