16 Dec 2011

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Posted 16 Dec 2011 00:30
Last edited 25 Mar 2012 16:35
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Friendship to Love

#1 of Friendship to Love


This is my first story, tell me what you think. I own these...

So hi, my name is Seth. I'm a nine-teen year old wolf. My fur is grey with a white belly. I've always been smaller than most other wolves, I'm only five eleven. I was always picked on by everyone, even my own family. There was only one fur who ever who always helped me out. His name is Alex. He's your basic red fox standing at six two.

My first memory of Alex was when I was in first grade. It was day one of school. I felt as if I stepped into the gates of hell right then. Anyways, I was having trouble with my locker, when my cousin Kevin who was third grade came up to me with a few of his friends and started pushing me around. I was trying not to cry when they took my stuff and started throwing it back and forth. When one fur threw it too far and went to go get it but they saw Alex had it first.

"Are we three?" he asked.

"Shut up," was all Kevin got before Alex interrupted him.

"No, you shut up. I remember you on the first day of school. Five minutes into school I remember you crying for your mommy." Alex said.

"So what?" Kevin asked.

"Just get lost." Alex said.

"Make us." Kevin said then he turned to look at his buddies who were gone then he looked at Alex and behind him was Alex's brother Tommy was in sixth grade.

"Problem bro?" Tommy asked then Kevin ran off.

Alex then came up to me and gave me my stuff.

"Thank you." I said taking it nervously.

"Mhm, so what's your name?" Alex asked.

"Seth." I said.

"Well I'm Alex. I'll take you to your class and make sure you're not in trouble." Alex said.

"Thank you." I said then Alex helped me with my locker then took me to my class.

So one of my favorite memories of Alex was when I was the seventh grade. Oh yeah before I go on, I forgot to mention I'm gay. This partly fits when with this memory because when I was in the seventh grade was when I figured out I was gay. The day it happened a friend had invited me over to his house, he was a brown furred coyote named Thomas. After hours of playing video games up in his room his mom came in the room and turned off the games and told us to go to bed. We both started to change into our basketball shorts when. As we did we both found out we both free balled. I remembered we both blushed deeply.

"So can I, umm," was all he got out before blushing even more and turning around.

"Only if I can you." I said.

I knew he was wanting to feel me or something along those lines. So he sat on his bed and I sat next to him. We both felt out each other. That's all I'm going to say on that part. Though later that day he asked me to be his boyfriend and I excepted then hugged him tight.

Things were good for about a week. Until one day at lunch my cousin see us holding each other. I didn't even notice he was there 'til I heard.

"Well it looks like little cousin is a fag." Kevin said making us jump and we let go of each other.

"Go away Kevin." I said.

"And miss a chance to make you squirm? Never." Kevin said.

"Come on Thomas." I said look behind me and seeing he had left. Now I was trying to cry and I had my face in my paws.

"Awwww, poor baby." Kevin said. Then I heard Kevin say "Let go of me." I then look up to see Alex holding Kevin's arm.

"Fine." Alex said then he shoved Kevin causing him to stumble then he looked at me and very quickly Alex stepped in-between Kevin and I. Kevin just ran off. Then Alex sat next to me and I quickly hugged him tight. He hugged back and rubbed my back. "Its okay." He said softly into my ears.

"Thank you." I said quietly.

"So why was he acting like that other than he's Kevin?" Alex asked.

"You'll hate me." I said looking down.

"I'll never hate you." Alex said putting a finger under my chin and lifting my head.

"Promise?" I asked.

"Promise." He said.

"It's because I'm," I said then I paused "I'm gay." I instantly looked away.

"You're not alone here." He said pulling me close then kissed my head and leaned his head on my mine. I later found Thomas who tried to explain why he ran away but I dumped his ass.

Now this is a very bittersweet memory for me. It was the summer of my freshman year. School was about to start in a week and I was set to be a sophomore. I was in my room playing video games when I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." I said then I paused the game and saw Alex walk in. "Hey." I said.

"Hey." He said quietly. I instantly knew something was wrong.

"What's up?" I asked concerned.

"Okay, I came here for two reasons. First to see you, obviously. My second reason," he said then he paused then said "You'll probably hate me."

"I'll never hate you." I said.

"I'm leaving for college." He said.

"I know." I said.

"I know but I'm going out of state." He said.

My jaw dropped and I instantly stood up.

"You can't leave." I said trying to cry.

"I have too." He said sounding just as upset.

"NO!" I yelled "You don't understand." I said crying.

"What don't I understand?" he asked.

"You can't leave because, because," I said getting choked up. "It's because I love you Alex." He instantly pulled me close and kissed me, my first kiss. When the kissed ended we just held each other close with his head resting on mine.

"If my dad was going to disown me I'd go to college here. He wants every generation of his family to go to the college he went." Alex said.

"When will you get back?" I asked

"I'm not sure." Alex said.

"Okay." I said then I sat on my bed and he sat with me and held me close. Then I laid my head on his shoulder. "Stay with me 'til you leave?" I asked.

"Mhm, I said good bye to everyone else and I don't have to leave 'til nine tomorrow morning." He said.

"Okay." I said then we laid on my bed and he held my close. I felt so loved and cared for in his arms. A few hours later Alex removed his shirt and then a few minutes later I heard him quietly snoring into my ears. I could his breath on the back of my neck and I could feel his chest slowly rising. I just smiled and took in this moment then I too fell asleep smiling.

The next morning I woke up just as Alex was writing a note. He then looked over at me and walked to me and hugged then kissed me.

"I promise I'll be back for you one day and I'll take you away from here." He said.

"How can you be sure?" I asked. Then he took off his neck with a simple tribal hook and placed it around my neck.

"Well, because you know have my favorite neck lace I got in Jamaica." He said then he kissed my forehead then left. I quickly ran after him and was just in time to see him drive off.

So now its been four, almost five years since Alex left. We talked every day then every chance he had, but he always took the time to send a text saying he missed me and that he loved me. So my mom found I'm gay, wasn't pretty. Anyways, the other day I was working out in my basement when my mom yelled down at me.

"Seth get up here please." She yelled.

"Okay." I yelled back then finished that current set up then went up stairs and as I turned into the living room I saw Alex then I ran at him and jumped in his arms then kissed him.

"I missed you so much." I said after the kiss.

"I missed you too." He said smiling and holding me.

Catperson 2 years ago 0
Love the writing. You've got good spelling, grammar and punctuation, and the story doesn't feel too rushed nor too slow. It's also got a sense of realism which is very hard to find in furry writing. All I might do is flesh out the details and thought processes of the characters a little bit to make it seem more realistic. But this chapter alone is better than at least half the stuff on here.

Also love the Joel avatar ^.^
Silver_Folf 2 years ago 0
Thank you for the complement and I'm not that great of an author. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Since I'm new to the writing world can you tell me what you mean by "flesh out the details and thought processes of the characters a little bit to make it seem more realistic"
Catperson 2 years ago 0
Well, try to picture yourself in your character's positions. Try to describe *why* they do what they do, maybe based on what you would have done? For instance-- what inspired Seth to tell Alex that he loved him? Was it because it may be his only chance? Was it because he was caught up in the moment? And why did Alex kiss him before even saying a word? What was Alex thinking when Seth told him he loved him? Letting the reader know what goes through your character's heads and lets the reader have more of a connection with your characters by making them seem relatable, and prevents your story from seeming cheesy or rushed.

This isn't necessarily the only way to do it either. You can also express your character's feelings by emphasizing their behavior. For instance, I'm guessing you read Concession. You know how timid/confused Matt is acting when he is with Joel on the beach? Try reading that page with no imagery and only speech bubbles-- it wouldn't be nearly as meaningful. Of course you can't have images in this kind of story, but you can *describe* how they're acting. Get what I mean?
Kausn_Husky 2 years ago 0
Interesting. I liked it. It seemed pretty literate, no noticeable spelling errors, and only a couple run-on sentences. I think it was a little short, but that's just me. It was a good length to get the reader interested, but not an overwhelmingly long introduction. The only think i would recommended is not to start a story with the word So. It seems just a little awkward, but it does seem to fit okay in this situation. For future reference, you should never start a sentence with words like "and, but, so" and any of those transition words. The only time I think its really acceptable is when a person is speaking because, lets face it, not everyone uses proper grammar when speaking at leisure. All in all, i really enjoyed this, and i think it's got the potential to be a really great story. Keep up the writing, your doing really well. Earned a fav, watch, and a 5 star rating. Good work. Can't wait to see more from you.

Silver_Folf 2 years ago 0
Thank you for the advice and complements and watch and favorite, etc. There is a next part, I just need to type it because I work on this series in a notebook during school when I have free time. So be looking for part two
KairoTheDragon 2 years ago 0
pretty good. it was a little rushed I think. but I would have written an entire chapter on the first scene alone..Just my style...anyway, it is a really good story.
Silver_Folf 2 years ago 0
Thank you but I would've been good but this was more of an opening story
KairoTheDragon 2 years ago 0
I figured.
Ryuuie 2 years ago 0
This is a pretty good story! :) Looking forward to seeing more from you.
Silver_Folf 2 years ago 0
Thanks and I should have the next part up soon, just need to type it.
DarrinThornwell 2 years ago 0
it is a vary good for a starter. a word or two that are missing but it is vary good, i hope you will write
Silver_Folf 2 years ago 0
Thank you. I plan to start now that I'm on Christmas break.
Blake_Foxx 1 week ago 1
This is a pretty good story. I really enjoyed it, it was cute :3
Silver_Folf 1 week ago 1
Thank you on all points and glad you liked it
Blake_Foxx 1 week ago 1
I'll have to read the second part soon ^-^
Silver_Folf 1 week ago 0
hope you enjoy ^^